Lufkin, TX - The workers of Selby Communications are happy
once again this morning, as their Office Jesus worked his miracles
with the coffee machine.
Every morning for the past three years Jesus has been making coffee
and sharing his words of wisdom with the people of Selby Communications. "Fellow
workers, we have a mission today to get broadband services to my
children of east Texas. Drink of this coffee, it is my blood. Eat
of these bagels they are my body. Now go out there and sell,
"The blood part kinda creeps me out," says co-worker Avery
McPhail, "but it's damn good coffee. I love his Sumatran-Mocha
Before Jesus arrived Selby Communications was a coffee-less company
with only $2.3 million in sales. Now the coffee is flowing
and they are approaching $78 million. All thanks to Jesus. These
facts haven't gone unnoticed by company executives who promoted Jesus
to VP of Coffee Making and Security.
President Henry Thomas said, "I think we hired him as a security
guard originally. I saw him tinkering with the coffee machine
one morning and told him that it hadn't worked for years, that it
would take a miracle for it to start working again. The next
thing I know I've got a hot cup of Ethiopian blend and I'm loving
Selby Communications is a privately held company, which sells broadband
and wireless services in East Texas and parts of Louisiana.
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