Los Angeles, CA - Metallica released their long awaited "Download
This" CD today, and the band declared it Napster-proof. The
74 minute CD contains one 55 minute song, "Napster Begone" and
a 19 minute, one-question interview with drummer Lars Ulrich.
to make an album that those bastards on Napster wouldn't steal and
I think we succeeded," said Lars. "We realized that
we couldn't stop the Napster movement, so we decided to make a Napster-proof
album. The 'Napster Begone' track is so long and so horrible
that no one in their right mind would take the time to download it. Our
loyal fans will buy it though, because most have spent so much money
on our merchandise that they can't afford a computer."
Critics agree that even people with the fastest connections to the internet
shouldn't bother downloading the 56+ MB "Napster Begone" MP3. "It's
pretty horrible," said one critic, "Luckily I got it for free. The
song goes on and on about how evil Napster is, then the interview is more of
the same thing. The interviewer asks Lars how he is doing and then he
blathers on for 19 minutes. Will that Lars ever shut up?"
Here's a snippet from some of the song's 278 verses:
Evil Napster, takes from me.
Crushing souls, and wrecking dreams,
MP3 you violate,
Copyrights, you desecrate.
Evil Napster, so dangerous
Stealing bread right from my mouth
T3 lines they are my bane
Evil Napster I wish you never came.
Pirates burning our CDs,
Screwing with my reality.
Evil Napster, devil from beyond
Music industry follower Steve Cazarini said, "I
don't think you'll see this done by many other artists. Sure
Metallica can pull off a 55 minute song, but a band like the Backstreet
Boys would run out of words that rhyme with 'fire' and 'love' after
about 6 minutes. Even the mega-dance remix of "I Want
It That Way" only ran for 8 minutes. It's just not an
option for most groups."
"Download This" is available now at your
local retailer and at your favorite online shops.
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