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Friday  September 15  11:29 AM EDT

Drunken Night Ends in DeCSS Tattoo, Jail

By Brian Briggs

His friends didn't think anyone was crazy enough, but a case of Bud Ice can make you do some stupid things.

"We were sitting around talking about how stupid the MPAA was when I said it would be neat if someone got the DeCSS code tattooed on them.  I didn't think anyone would actually do it," said Paul's roommate Ali Khafari.  Little did Paul and Ali know that MPAA lawyers had been monitoring their conversation with the listening devices installed in all DVD players.   The code, developed by hackers, has helped make it possible for computer users to copy full-length feature films from DVDs onto their hard drives or other recordable media.

MPAA Correctional Facility"When they left their apartment for the tattoo shop the situation went to Code Red," MPAA Covert Ops Director Terry Wills said.   "We tried to get our people there before the tattoo was done, but it was too late. We had little choice but to take him into custody."

Ten MPAA Agents, mostly former Navy Seals, captured a staggering Rugbear just outside his apartment building.  Paul is now being held in solitary confinement at the MPAA Correctional Facility outside Hollywood. "We can't take the chance that he may take off his shirt and expose the code to other inmates.  He'll remain in solitary until his tattoos are removed," said Director Wills.

Legal experts are divided on the issue.  Some claim that a tattoo is considered speech and is protected by the Constitution.  Others disagree stating that Mr. Rugbear's tattoo's threaten the very livelihood of stars such as Tom Hanks and Brad Pitt.   One lawyer said "You wouldn't want to see Jim Carrey forced into a homeless shelter would you?"

A puking Rugbear said, "Man, I am so hungover.  Where am I?  Why does my chesst hurt so much?"  When informed of his situation Paul replied, "I'll never get rid this tattoo, it would kill me to get it removed."  In a strange coincidence a Federal Judge ruled that Paul either remove his tattoo or be executed by lethal injection under the Federal Copyright Violation Statute of 2000.

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