Seattle, WA - The cleanup in chess clubs and computer labs are just
beginning after a wave of riots broke out this morning at the University
of Washington following the defeat of The Lord of the Rings: The
Fellowship of the Ring by A Beautiful Mind in the Academy Awards.
The Lord of the Rings won four Oscars mainly for technical achievement
while A Beautiful Mind won the "big" awards of Best Director,
Picture, Screenplay, and Supporting Actress.
were smashed and track balls overturned in anger at the decision
to deny The Lord of The Rings the honor many fans thought it rightfully
deserved. "It's the best movie ever!" exclaimed Henry Colton,
19. "Way better than The Matrix and The Phantom Menace, those
movies would have to drop to number 2 and 3 now and maybe even behind
The Two Towers because it's gonna be awesome!. How could the Academy
be so narrow minded about a fantasy film?"
Fans were also furious that Ian MacKellan was denied an Oscar for
Best Supporting Actor. Jim Broadbent walked away with the award for
his performance in Iris. "Gandalf should shoot a fireball at
that lard ass Broadbent," said Gregory Macy. "I didn't
even see Iris but I guarantee you Ian was better. I say lock them
both up in Orthanc and let them go at it. "
Angry students spraypinted "Frodo Lives" and "Throw
Opie to the Wargs!" on school buildings, and set fire to several
schizophrenics. Riot police who broke up the disturbance said many
students were armed with blue plastic swords.
"I'd like to see John Nash calculate his way out of the Mines
of Moria. He wouldn't even make it to the Bridge at Khazad-Dum, let
alone past the Balrog," said Donald Reinhart of the Tri-County
Council of Elrond.
One student said he was downloading the entire Alanis Morrisette
album from Morpheus to show his disgust for the decision and everything
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