Aug 23 - Sep 22
You'll have a short but unpleasant brush with reality at the beginning of the
week, but everything should be weird again by Wednesday.
Sep 23 - Oct 23
Technological gadgets that should make your life easier create dramas when
they seem to cause more complications than they cure. Go back to digital watches,
you'll never learn how to read the hands at this age.
Oct 24 - Nov 21
As of Monday, the muscle of your right index will be the largest muscle in
your body. Congratulations, you're now officially part of the Internet and
Gaming Addicts Club.
Nov 22 - Dec 21
Your friends will do you a huge favor by creating a BBspot personal for you.
You knew that picture of you in drag would come back to haunt you, didn't you?
Dec 22 - Jan 19
First step towards scoring a hot vulcan babe is to develop interstellar travel.
So get back to work.
Jan 20 - Feb 18
This weeks horoscope has been falsified by nine out of ten scientists. The
tenth guy works for the UN.
Feb 19 - Mar 20
Your work becomes an art form as you apply yourself to it with innovative creativity,
yet you worry about making mistakes or being misunderstood. You must learn to
realize that that's the thrill in parking cars.
Mar 21 - Apr 19
The stars have something new in store for you this week, but their NDA is too
prohibitive so I couldn't find out.
Apr 20 - May 20
[Necromancers only] Your summoned monsters are plotting against you. Maybe
you should go easier on them for a few days.
May 21 - June 21
You are slowly starting to realize, that trekkers take their hobby seriously.
If not, finding a Klingon head in your bed should help.
June 22 - July 22
Ever the optimist, your gullibility in believing the BBspot story about house-sized
heat sinks may have led to some bad decisions on using that Home Equity loan
July 23 - Aug 22
Though the start of the week is dominated by domestic issues, it ends with
the focus firmly on your working and professional environment. The overall
trend covering both these aspects of your life is elimination. Terminator style.