Sagittarius
Nov 22 - Dec 21
Thanks to a makeover from the fellows at Queer Eye for the Straight
Scope, your horoscope this week has been italicized.
Capricorn
Dec 22 - Jan 19
Competition was fierce amongst the stars this week to cast your horoscope.
This one was the low bidder.
Aquarius
Jan 20 - Feb 18
The goddess Saraswati predicts that your job may soon be outsourced to cheap
foreign labor - watch out!
Pisces
Feb 19 - Mar 20
What's that saying about "a bird in hand?" Well, you're going to
be seeing a whole flock of birds flipped your way when you run a stop sign
this week.
Aries
Mar 21 - Apr 19
It may have been the way the cookie crumbled, but in so doing, it completely
disabled your browser!
Taurus
Apr 20 - May 20
You will suffer from a rather strong growing sense of deja vu the next few
days, culminating in getting this exact same horoscope next week. |
Gemini
May 21 - June 21
A rare cosmic phenomenon will make you find Dilbert funny next week - but only
for a few minutes.
Cancer
June 22 - July 22
That gigantic $10 unknown electronic device with 5 SCSI attachments you found
at the thrift store may impress your geek friends online, but your mom still
wants it out of the garage by Saturday.
Leo
July 23 - Aug 22
Sorry, but no one will ever believe that your cash flow problems are caused
by the high ping of your bank's server.
Virgo
Aug 23 - Sep 22
Holy shit, is that smoke coming from your CPU?!?
Made you look.
Libra
Sep 23 - Oct 23
The stars will come visiting this week. Literally. Sorry about the house, but
NASA wants to come by to pick up samples.
Scorpio
Oct 24 - Nov 21
You will reach a state of great enlightenment when you realize that all the "top
10" lists that seemed to contain eight extra items, were not counting
in binary. |
