Hodgenville, KY – On a recent field trip by Springfield sixth
graders to Lincoln Homestead State Park, many students complained
the historical site failed to meet any of their expectations and
should have utilized more Flash.
"The field trip began without incident," explained teacher Meredith
Spencer, 42. "Most of the students were excited and some even
asked if they would be allowed to download images to show their parents.
I assumed that they wanted to take photos of the monument and the
log cabin, so I told them that they could."
Spencer added that she did not suspect anything was out of order
when students used the term download. "I've been teaching for
20 years," she told The Daily Bull, "and I've had to put
up with all sorts of lingo. Cowabunga, havin' a roni, whatchoo' talkin'
'bout, suck it... I've heard it all. The little buggers are always
talking gibberish about their Poke-balls smelling what their Turtle-power
is cooking, so I usually ignore it."
Student Timmy Bonds was eager to offer his critique of the historical
site on reaching their destination. "If you think Geocities
is bad, man, check out this dump," he said of the national monument. "I
mean, it took about a million years for this site to load, and we
had to walk up three flights of stairs. So much for swift and easy
navigation. They need higher bandwidth, and they should fire the
guy who designed this site. He sucks."
"I don't know why anyone would want to visit this site. Where's
the interactivity? Where's the fancy menu? Where's the Flash? There
be a game where you can have Lincoln drink alcohol and make
lewd passes at women in bikinis." Several of Bonds' classmates
echoed similar sentiments, complaining of issues such as excessive
scrolling in the exhibits and ill-contrasting color schemes.
One of the major concerns expressed by Bonds was the lack of
support, as some children were not tall enough to view several
Bonds did point out some positive elements, however. "At
least there are no pop-ups, though I wish there was a way to turn
annoying voice that keeps telling us about everything," he
said, referring to Becky Davis, a college student who got
a summer job
as a tour guide at the memorial.
Overall, Bonds said, the
historical site is lame but he's seen worse. "They
could make it a lot better by adding more animation and maybe
some DHTML. I want to be dazzled and have tons of stuff to
do when I go
to a site," he finished. "This ain't no Zombo.com;
I can do anything there."
This article appears courtesy of the fine folks at The
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