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Reasons to Vote
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| 11. |
To escape the "get out the vote" phone calls, mailings and door-to-door volunteers on election day. |
| 10. |
Perfect opportunity to check if your e-vote hack is in place. |
| 9. |
Because if you don’t vote, the terrorists win. (unless you were going to vote for the terrorists, in which case they win anyway). |
| 8. |
It’ll be good practice for the court-ordered recount election to be held Feb. 9, 2005. |
| 7. |
Because this year Al Franken will literally beat the shit out of you if you’re not wearing an “I Voted” sticker. |
| 6. |
To shut up all those "If you didn't vote then you can't complain" people. |
| 5. |
Your opportunity for vote for people with funny names like "Kuntz" and "Bloho". |
| 4. |
You like to stand in lines and pretend you're in line for Pirates of the Caribbean at Disney World. |
| 3. |
Because there's an easter egg in the e-vote machine. Hit right-right-left-Kerry to see Britney Spears naked. |
| 2. |
To relive those test taking days in college when you just filled in the circles randomly hoping to get some right. |
| 1. |
Because this is the most important election of our lifetime, (unlike, say, 1996, which was, like, totally lame. Why did they even have an election then?) |
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