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Tuesday, May 1 12:00 AM EDT

Signs Your Presidential Candidate is Not a Geek

11. Blames violence, prostitution, poverty, migraine headaches, rug burn, syphilis, and diaper rash on video games.
10. Thinks Ubuntu is the new President of Nigeria.
9. Prefaces web sites with the word "the," like "the Google," "the MySpace," or "The YouTube."
8. The candidate's web site makes copious use of the <blink> tag.
7. Calls his or her National Security plan, "The Matrix."
6. Uses an aol.com e-mail address.
5. Thinks Firefox is one of those "pokey men my kids play with."
4. Thinks DRM is an old school rapper
3. Praises Ted Stevens as a "guru of emerging technologies."
2. Still uses MSN as their home page.
1. Thinks a Blackberry is a yummy flavor for a pie.


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