Redmond, WA – Microsoft executives blamed higher ticket prices and a "lack of originality" for record sales of Halo 3.
"We thought we'd get some good sales, but nothing like this," said Microsoft executive Bob Frederickson. "But with escalating ticket prices and the crappy movies Hollywood has been putting out. People are just hungry for entertainment."
Frederickson added that the record sales for Halo 3 have also caused booming sales for Xbox console as well as other Xbox accessories. "Gee thanks, Ben Stiller, with all this business our guys haven't gotten much rest."
Frederickson showed some internal data that demonstrated how an actually funny movie from Ben Stiller would've impacted sales. "This data shows a quality comedy starring Ben Stiller and not just some movie trying to recapture the "Something About Mary" magic, would've dampened Halo 3 sales by 10%. A movie where Charlize Theron appears nude would've decreased sales by 35%," said Frederickson
Many in Hollywood contest the data. Including Karl Goldsmith of Paramount Pictures. He said, "I don't think you can tie the record game sales only to bad movies. I mean the music and television industry isn't producing anything so hot either. Look at Caveman! Is that keeping anybody away from their Xbox 360?"
Fans of Halo 3 agree. Chad Phillips from Rockford, Illinois said, "I'm not going to pay $12 for another derivative Ben Still movie. I'd rather pay $60 for another derivative first-person shooter."
Microsoft sees even more reason to be sanguine about the future for video game sales. Frederickson said, "There's no Star Wars or Lord of the Rings on the horizon to slow sales. What have they got, Alvin and the Chipmunks?"