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Tuesday, March 18 12:00 AM EDT

Geeks Will Cope with Economic Armageddon


11. Move all their investments to a stable currency like Zorkmids.
10. Stop questing and start mining Thorium.
9. Melting down spare computer components for scrap metals.
8. Blackmail Bill Gates with secret video of him praising Windows ME.
7. Use math to show how using kids as food source could be profitable.
6. Rewatch post-apocalyptic movies and take extensive notes.
5. Reverse scam Nigerian spammers.
4. Stop spending extra 10 cents to get the "top shelf" ramen.
3. Start charging family members for fixing their computers.
2. Start walking the streets and selling their bodies... to rogue organ harvesters.
1. Don't panic.

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