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Tuesday, August 26 12:00 AM EDT

Changes After Kids Go Back to School

11. With kids at school, you only have to worry about ceiling cat watching you.
10. Fewer high point kids on the streets during death race.
9. Can play an online Halo 3 match during the day... and win!
8. Can make kids do homework so you can play video games uninterrupted at night.
7. Summer activities money can now be spent on more RAM.
6. Can watch Nova and Nova Science Now without being asked questions you don't know the answers to.
5. Can go back to ramen lunches instead of cooking healthy food for the kids.
4. Some "me" time with Darth and Yoda
3. Can finally get some sun by driving the kids to school.
2. Don't have to share the Legos any more.
1. Grammar/spelling quality on the Internet increases tenfold.

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