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Thursday, November 20 12:00 AM ET

Department of Treasury Introduces Consumer Achievements as Part of Economic Stimulus Plan

By Brian Briggs

Washington D. C. - Secretary of the Treasury Henry Paulson announced that the government would begin implementing video game like achievements for consumers to help stimulate consumer spending.

"Consumers are two-thirds of the economy, so we're trying to find the best way to get them buying again.  Achievements in video games have been successful in getting people to playing games more than they should, so we're hoping these consumer achievements get people buying more than they should to get the economy going again," said Paulson.

Citizens do not have to do anything to enroll in the program and purchases are tracked automatically using technology from the NSA. Taxpayers can follow their achievements on the new Web site.

For all achievements reached, citizens will receive a small graphic they can display on their personal blog, and that will be printed on their passport.  Accumulating enough achievements will allow citizens to unlock more valuable achievements, which can result in rewards like a tax rebate or lunch with a Senator.

The BBook of Geek

Consumers were excited by the news.  "I'm hopelessly in debt and my home is being foreclosed on, but I think I can scrape enough together to get the "Feed Family" achievement," said Claudia Harcox of Muncie, Indiana.

Paulson also hinted that if successful this program might be expanded to business with achievements like "Recapitalize a Bank" and "Create 100 Jobs in One Quarter."

A small group of the achievement graphics were released to the press with the full list available at the Web site.

Cash King Eater Outer
Cash King - Purchase over $200 worth of merchandise using cash. Eater Outer - Eat away from home for more than half your meals in a month.
Go Big Gun Guru
Go Big or Go Home - Purchase two or more SUVs in a calendar year. Gun Guru - Arm yourself with a newly purchased handgun.
Jewel Giant Material Girl
Jewel Giant - Purchase $1000 worth of jewelry a month for three consecutive months. Material Girl - Any combination of jewels, clothes or spa treatments worth $2500 in a month.
Speed Demon  
Speed Demon - Purchase a sports car with estimated MPG under 10.  


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