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Imaginary Features for the Imaginary Apple Tablet
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| 11. |
No-button design makes it impossible to turn on. |
| 10. |
Fully integrates into your flying car. |
| 9. |
The startup sound has the ability to tame unicorns and capture leprechauns. |
| 8. |
It's only available in the colour Smug. |
| 7. |
When not in use, the tablet can be stored in the Ark of The Covenant (included) |
| 6. |
Does not even have a battery to remove. Powered only by your awesomeness. |
| 5. |
Has LubriSlime coating so it's easier to swallow. |
| 4. |
Can be used as a flotation device. |
| 3. |
Automatically downloads free hardware upgrades. |
| 2. |
Only plays content in new media format so any electronic media you have will need to be repurchased. |
| 1. |
Was created by man. It rebelled. It evolved. It looks and feels human. Some are programmed to think they are human. There are many copies. And they have… a plan. |
This one goes to 11.
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