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Friday, August 22 2:00 PM EDT

Rest of Country Plans to Recall California

By Brian Briggs

Sacramento, CA - In only the second time in U.S. history, 49 states will be voting to recall California. If the measure succeeds, California will be forced to renounce statehood and will either become a sovereign nation of its own, or join with another nation such as Mexico.

The United States may be taking a new shape in December
(shown with Madagascar)

American history professor, Ernest Detor, explained the historic ramifications. "According to Section 12, Article 3 of the United States Constitution, if 80% of the states agree then a recall election can be held. This only happened once before. Back in 1874, Nebraska faced a recall vote after the rest of the states got tired of its corny jokes."

Recent events such as the circus surrounding California's own recall vote of its Governor and the release of the film Gigli has forced U.S. residents to act. The campaign to recall California has been funded mostly by Oregon.

"It's ridiculous what is going on out in California. I'm really ashamed to have them as part of the country," declared Marisa Ricola from Montpelier, Vermont. "They can't put out crap like Gigli and expect to remain part of the union."

Sharon Willis, a high school senior at Lincoln Consolidated Schools in Oklahoma City, said, "I think a strong message is being sent to all the other states. Behave or be kicked out. You hear that Canada? Shape up or you could be next."

Up to 100 countries could be on the ballot to replace California. Already, Puerto Rico, Madagascar, and porn star Portugal have announced their plans to replace California. To be eligible for replacement a country needs 3,500 people and must submit a $100 application fee.

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President Bush expressed relief and said that while losing a large state like California would hurt tax revenue, at least his re-election campaign would be a lot easier.

California, which became the 31st state in 1850, will face the recall on November 19th.

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