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Slashdot.org - Biblical scholars
have long pondered which operating system Jesus will use when he
returns. While the Vatican mulls its official stance, the
debate rages on in the Slashdot message forums...
 What OS Would Jesus Have Chosen? |
 Posted by MrJingles on Tuesday August 07, @08:26PM
from the son-of-god dept.
An interesting article has
been posted over at the FreeBSD site
on which OS Jesus would have chosen had he come back for the new millenium
as promised. They go through several different flavors even some lesser
known varieties, like PTX. I'm impressed by the authors' impartiality
as FreeBSD ended up in 4th place (mostly
because of their daemon mascot). For those who don't want to wade through
the entire article, it ended up a tie between DR-DOS and OS/2.
< Paul
Harvey Not Dead Yet | Ask Slashdot: Do Squirrels
Dream in Color? > |
OS of the Lord? (Score:4,
Amen Brother!)
by badhairday (al@<redacted>.com) on
Monday August 07,@08:30PM EDT(#4)
(User #92656842 Info) |
| This story is old news. I have a full treatise
on the OS that Jesus would pick and it ain't DR-DOS. Here's
just a sample from my site.
If Jesus were around today what OS would he be running?
Let's think for a minute. "Do unto others as you would
have them do unto you." Hmm... driving other companies
into bankruptcy using predatory business practices, doesn't
sound very Christian to me. On the other hand the open source
movement is all about sharing and cooperation. Winner: Linux,
Free BSD.
Jesus was a very friendly guy so he would want a user-friendly
OS. He probably would've gone for either Windows 98 or
Mac OS in this regard. I think Windows edges out the
Mac, because Steve Jobs thinks he's God and Jesus wouldn't
like that very much. Winner: Windows 98
In the end the winner was TRS-DOS cause that's what Jesus told
me.
Al
What
Would Jesus Run? (WWJR) |
| [Reply to This | Parent] |
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your current threshold.
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Shoddy research (Score:3,
Hallelujah)
by coriolisinfection on Monday August 07,@08:33PM EDT(#7)
(User #8675309 Info) |
| I read the FreeBSD article yesterday and felt is
was horribly incomplete so I decided to do a little research
on my own. First, I did a survey using the MMPI-2 to get a psychological profile
of the users for each OS. The FreeBSD paper also ignored
many older operating systems. I wasn't able to get a large enough
sample size to get significant results so I recruited the help
of some computer historians to construct a psychological model
for those users. With that done I then contacted the leading
Biblical scholars to get their best guess at the psychological
makeup of Jesus. With this data in hand all it took was a little
number crunching to come up with the answer.
Given their propensity for martyrdom, and the fact that it has
been killed and resurrected so many times, I can say with 97.8%
+/- 0.342% certainty that Jesus would have used an Amiga.
\_Dr. Jenny Coriolis_/
"It's better to have loved and lost, than to be gang raped in a Turkish
prison." |
| [Reply to This | Parent] |
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Vader's Choice (Score:5 1, Informative Check
Your Facts)
by LesDeNapper on Monday August 07,@08:37PM EDT(#9)
(User #317537 Info) |
| I don't know what Jesus would have chosen but I
do know that Darth Vader was running a Windows based OS on the
Death Star. How else could R2D2 have hacked into the system so
easily? If Vader had chosen Linux then maybe all those Storm
Troopers could've gone home and seen their families.
Les
mybuttrunslinux.com |
| [Reply to This | Parent] |
Wrong! (Score:6,
More Informative)
by jedi-master-frank on Monday August 07,@08:40PM EDT(#27)
(User #55378008 Info) |
| You're such a boob, Star Wars took place
in "a long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away." A
windows based system couldn't have been developed then. It's
possible it could have been some early Unix variation
that was misconfigured.
Jedi Master Frank
The Force is in my Pants |
| [Reply to This | Parent] |
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|
- Keep
AOLers off /. by Rambuki24 (Score:1) Monday
August 07, @08:44PM EDT
- Long
Time Ago ring a bell? by dunpul2 (Score:1) Monday
August 07, @08:48PM EDT
- 17428
replies beneath your current threshold.
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Face the Facts (Score:3,
Off Topic but Funny :-)
by YetiCow (yeticow@bigfoot.com) on
Monday August 07,@08:38PM EDT(#21)
(User #11235813 Info) |
| I think it was Benjamin Franklin or maybe Fibonacci
who said, "You can lead a horse to water, but try that with
a dead elephant. Not as easy is it?" |
| [Reply to This | Parent] |
Slashdot founder Rob Malda was reached for comment
while driving a tank around the state of Nevada which he purchased
last week and is currently wiring it for gigabit ethernet. When asked
which OS he thought Jesus would have chosen he responded "The
Who show in Detroit was pretty excellent, and I was pleased that
they included several of the mod hits, along with the stable stadium
rock hits. It was pretty amazing to see Pete windmilling away
for real and not on VHS"
A little puzzle has been included in this story if you are so
inclined. Each User ID number, has some significance (For
example, for a user id of 5551212 the answer would be "Phone
number for information." Not all of them are this easy.) A
clue has been included in each message to help you out. The
answers can be found here.
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