|
Washington DC - Many think the war in cs_iraq is over, but one terrorist
is camping an obscure corner of the map trying to force a draw, according
to US Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld.
 "He
knows he can't win the round, so he's just camping where we can't
find him, waiting for time to run out. Saddam is such a lamer," claimed
Rumsfeld in a press conference today. "He's probably wallhacking
too."
"This is just another example of his pattern of behavior,"continued
Rumsfeld, who accused the {Ba'ath} clan of hiding behind hostages
to decrease the US's score, in addition to other war crimes. "Its
these cheaters and lamers that are ruining the fun of war for the
rest of us."
The [US] clan has rolled through recent tournaments, handing defeat
to the |TaLiBAN| clan in cs_kandahar, but has come under fire in
the press lately for accusations of AWP-whoring and bunny-hopping.
Elite defense analyst Thomas Franklin points out that clan [US] has
repeatedly refused requests that they install Punkbuster. "They
have no credibility. How do we know they're not cheating themselves?
What a bunch of whiners."
Rumsfeld dismisses these charges. "This is all just a smoke
and mirrors act. Saddam is the real cheater here. We have definitive
proof that he used aimbot tons and tons of times, we just can't find
it."
When asked about what upcoming clan battles team [US] has planned,
Rumsfeld replied, "I just want to say that we're aware of what
-=NK=-KimJong-afk has been saying about us in chatrooms. We'll see
if he can still talk that trash after I headshot him with my deagle.
This isn't Starcraft. Those Koreans don't stand a chance."
-=NK=-KimJong-afk was unavailable for comment. More
News
Recommend this
Story to a Friend
|
