Happy Thanksgiving and a BBeliever Daily Links - 11/10/11 Daily Links - 11/2/11
Fun at Sea
Football Fans
Great College
Top 11
Top 11 Things Geeks Would Do After Being Rescued from a Mine
PC Weenies
The Neverending Story
Gratuity Not Included
Uptime Downtime
Geek Horoscopes
Random Geek Horoscopes
How White and Nerdy Are You?
Bush Proposes Faith- Based Firewalls for Government Computers
Microsoft Purchases Evil From Satan
Slashdot Story Generator
Which OS Are You?
Teen Using MySpace to Lure Bands to Los Angeles
The BBook of Geek
[H]ard Folding Team
The Toque
Worth 1000
Joe the Peacock
PC Weenies
Mental Floss
Smashing Games
Free Codecs
Geek Press
Wil Wheaton
Jonathan Coulton
Um... Things
Jokes Gallery
Funny Pictures
More Links

Thursday, January 15 12:01 AM EST

Intel Unveils Coffee Nanoprocessors

By Francisco Rangel

San Jose, Costa Rica - Intel announced that it will join forces with a Costa Rican coffee exporting company, Café Britt, to produce a coffee-nanoprocessor hybrid, to increase productivity among computer engineers and other coffee addicts.

Intel Inside"We got the idea after we set up a processor manufacturing plant in Costa Rica," explained Intel representative, Gerald Meyers. "We had to choose a country in which to build the plant, and when the Costa Rican government offered management a year's supply of coffee we couldn't refuse. We loved the coffee so much, we wanted to incorporate it into our technology. However, our Coffee-Powered processors didn't work too well, so we went the other way around and incorporated our technology into their coffee."

The idea behind Pentium Coffee is simple. Nanoprocessors are mixed in with the coffee, and swallowed by the consumer. These microprocessors enter the bloodstream, travel around the body, and linked to the nervous system. These nanoprocessors aid the brain by performing complex mathematical operations. The processor’s perfomance is measured in CAFS (Complex Arithmetic Functions).

Related News

AMD Starts Rating Chips in Giggahertz

Overclocker Creates Rift in Space-Time Continuum

AMD to Release New Moron Processor

Production is expected to begin in late June, when the developers' coffee-induced hyperactivity is expected to calm down. The coffee will be sold in anti-static plastic bags, and will come in three different flavors: Regular (100 Teracafs), MMX (200 Teracafs), and Celeron (50 Teracafs).

ATI has also announced that it will pair up with Folgers to produce Radeon-coffee hybrids to help with mental image processing.

Recommend This Story to a Friend


Previous Story:

First Annual Trailer Awards
Next Story:

Startup Messages You Don't Want to See

RSS Feed Subscribe
Follow on Twitter Follow Us on Twitter
Facebook Fan Us on Facebook
Amazon Find the BBook


  Politics Contact FAQs

sharepoint survey web part - make money online

Copyright 1999-2011 by BBspot LLC
BBspot is a tech satire news and geek humor source, and meant to be funny.
If you are easily offended, gullible, or don't have a sense of humor, we suggest you go elsewhere. Those without the geek gene activated should also avoid this site.