Now you too can enjoy my Inbox without the annoying spam. Every week I get some amazing e-mail. Some amazing because of the sheer cluelessness of the sender, some because of the time and energy that went into crafting them and some are just simply amazing.
I think somebody is taking our reviews a bit too seriously...
From: Jeff (email@example.com)
Sent: Sunday, June 06, 2004 12:23 PM
You have got to be the worst hardware review guy ever...
Maybe I should stick to software.
Sent: Wednesday, June 16, 2004 10:17 AM
Not sure if this means I am doing the work of God, or if it is so good that it's on par with God's work. I've seen the Kids in the Hall sketch so I know it's not a typo.
Sent: Tuesday, June 22, 2004 4:59 PM
Subject: A Believer
Just to let you know the "Enhancement of Service attack" got posted on ActiveWin
Leads you to believe in the downfall of humanity or something
Or at least in the downfall of Windows sites.
One reader thinks I should take more extreme measures in the matter of Ensenam Ayele...
Sent: Thursday, June 10, 2004 12:47 AM
Subject: Esenam Ayele
You really should insert another line every three lines saying "this is satire and fake" and add a "this is satire and fake" watermark background images on that page. Hopefully people would get the message then
Sadly, I still think I would get e-mail about this.
A couple weeks ago we had a correction about God creating the universe in seven days. Now, we get a couple corrections of that correction...
Sent: Thursday, June 10, 2004 9:15 AM
Subject: Mailbag: "Geek Corrections" or "Hah, call THAT a correction?"
"FYI, God created the universe in SIX days according to the Bible in Genesis chapter 1, verse 31 through chapter 2, verse 2:"
I think your esteemed reader should note that the Earth was not created on the first day, but before it, as day and night were created after the Earth, Genesis 1:2 to 1:5. I am not a religious person, but I damn hate it when these people make up a mythology and can't even be bothered to learn it!
George also adds another correction on our BBlooper-cum-shooter...
From: George Beckingham
Sent: Wednesday, June 09, 2004 3:18 AM
Subject: Geek corrections of geek corrections
Two corrections of the corrections you received last week:
God may have finished the actual work of creating the world in six days, but the Bible stresses that he rested on the seventh. He obviously won the contract based on seven days of work, and finished early. So he was paid for seven days. He obviously cut corners to finish early, at fact that is obvious when looking at animals such as the duck-billed platypus and the Armani-breasted lawyer.
And the "cum shooter" in the video game blooper /was/ a mistake. As the dictionary entry quoted by the respondent-cum-grammarian clearly shows, this small but loaded word (no pun intended) must be connected to the surrounding words using hyphens. Otherwise, the game reviewer was implying what the blooper inferred.
That's all for this week!
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