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Wednesday, October 6 12:00 AM ET

BBspot Mailbag

Now you too can enjoy my Inbox without the annoying spam. Every week I get some amazing e-mail. Some amazing because of the sheer cluelessness of the sender, some because of the time and energy that went into crafting them and some are just simply amazing.


Believers

Who wants to be a Nigerian billionaire?

From: maria
Sent: Friday, October 01, 2004 10:52 PM
To: briggsb@bbspot.com
Subject: are there any


hello I know you get bothered a lot about this
are there any millionaires that donate money for individual causes and if there are can you please direct me to any
I am having a hard time so need help .... here is my website <snip>

I think she is having a hard time reading the disclaimers on the site as well.

From: barbara
Sent: Wednesday, September 29, 2004 7:51 PM
To: briggsb@bbspot.com
Subject: nigerian billionaire

hi how r u all doing? fine i hope. will i just came across this article about mr. esenam ayele and want to give it away. i am interested in this but the last post i saw was in jan '04 so can u help me get in contact with him i really could use his help it dones't have to millions of dollers and i just need a little to get through: here is a little about me i'm 31 single i'm over 350 lbs and need surgery to lose the weight but don't have the money, i work fulltime but i berrly make it paycheck to paycheck. if i can just get help for that and a little extra to make do until i can get back on my feet and back to work after surgery. please please help i really need all the help i can get thank u for u time i'm sorry if i sound like i begging but i really need some help and thank u for ur time

p.s: here is may e_mail address it u need to cantact me it is <snip> and thanks again.

U r wellcom. Srry I cann't helpp. I am just a satyre webmasster.

From: tina
Sent: Tuesday, September 28, 2004 3:11 PM
To: briggsb@bbspot.com
Subject: giving away millions

how can a nigeria give away millions in someone else account is there a scam about this.i received emails on this but that want you to pay for expense. tell me if this is a fraud
sincerely american

They can do it by absolutely confusing people with what they say.

And now another PHP believer...

From: xxxxxxxx@freemail.hu
Sent: Tuesday, September 28, 2004 4:37 PM
To: briggsb@bbspot.com
Subject: ????? please give a answer

Hi!

Wednesday June 14 10:10 PM EDT

Student Suspended Over
Suspected Use of PHP

You wrote this story. It is true? My friend, and I can't belive it. This is very hard......
Adios, with hungary!!!
Laca, and Hege

Weren't those guys a couple of characters on SNL?


Dead Like Me

I was informed that I recently appeared on a episode of Dead Like Me...

I've avoided the Lane Sports Bar this week. Thanks Nikolaj.


AMD or Intel

Last mailbag entries on the CPU front...

From: xxxxxx@intel.com
Sent: Wednesday, September 29, 2004 12:30 PM
To: briggsb@bbspot.com
Subject: Intel!


I have always used Intel Processors and Motherboards and never had a problem with them. Although AMD is cheaper, Intel is far more stable. Having built (too many) computers for my family, I have noticed that the ones with Intel processors are more stable than the AMD ones. I built one for my uncle three years go (Intel Proc), and then two for my cousin and sister a year ago (AMD). The AMD machines have had some slight stability issues. I have a P4 2.4Ghz Hyperthreaded right now, and it performs very well. Although, to take advantage of hyperthreading you need to have applications that are specifically written for that.

I don’t know why you’d need a 64-bit processor (unless you are heavily into gaming). I mean, how many 64-bit apps are there? I think in your case it’s best that you go with a P4. Oh yeah, I am not just saying all this because I work at Intel. No, seriously…

Disclaimer: The views expressed in this email are my own and do not necessarily reflect the position of the Intel Corporation.

Systems Validation Engineer
Intel Corporation

The AMD rep hasn't contacted me yet, but I imagine someone will soon.

From: Giorgio
Sent: Wednesday, September 29, 2004 3:39 AM
To: briggsb@bbspot.com
Subject: New Computer

Dear BBspot,
do you remember the time the computers didn't freeze? They didn’t have any reset button? Why don’t' buy mine shining CBM 8032 SK with a double floppy and a very slow printer? It come with a SEPARATE KEYBOARD !!! I don't remember a single case that a program freeze the computer. Maybe because it's al loooong time ago?

Greeatings

There's an option I hadn't considered (for good reason)...

From: Tristan
Sent: Tuesday, September 28, 2004 1:14 AM
To: briggsb@bbspot.com
Subject: processor

Athlon 64 all the way. It's much better quality, is faster than a P4, and you'll be well-equipped when more 64-bit stuff starts coming out. A friend of mine built a system with an Athlon 64 and it is hella fast (the high-end RAM helps though). I know another friend who has a P4 w/ hyperthreading and similar high-end parts and the Athlon 64 machine performs just as well, if not better than the P4 system. That's just my humble opinion (aka the truth).


Oklahoma State University Announces New Athletic Language Program

By Ralf the Dog

Oklahoma State University, Stillwater today has announced that it will begin releasing all of its athletic press releases, and play by play commentary in Latin.


According to Athletic Director Harry Birdwell

Asway anway agriculturalway oolschay, eway avehay alwaysway eltfay atthay eway adhay away isadvantageday enwhay itway amecay otay ourway academicway eputationray. Isthay angechay illway ovepray atthay eway areway ustjay asway artsmay asway osethay ancyfay eastway oastcay oolsschay.

Iway inkthay atthay earninglay ethay implesay ulesray orfay anslatingtray etweenbay Englishway andway Atinlay ouldshay alsoway ivegay ourway udentsstay away igbay advantageway enwhay eythay ogay otay Exicomay (andway Ewnay Exicomay) orfay ingspray eakbray.

Translation: As an agricultural school, we have always felt that we had a disadvantage when it came to our academic reputation. This change will prove that we are just as smart as those fancy East coast schools.

I think that learning the simple rules for translating between English and Latin should give our students a big advantage when they go to Mexico (or New Mexico) for spring break.

When asked for an example press release, they gave us this.

ILLWATERSTAY, Oklaway. -- Onovanday Oodsway ewthray otway ouchdowntay assespay andway anray orfay anotherway andway Ernandvay Orencymay ushedray orfay 116 ardsyay otay eadlay Oklahomaway Atestay astpay USMAY 59-7 Aturdaysay ightnay. Arrentday Illiamsway adhay 215 eturnray ardsyay andway Uand'JAY Oodsway aughtcay otway ouchdowntay assespay orfay ethay Owboyscay (3-0), owhay outedray ethay Ustangsmay (0-3) orfay ethay irdthay aightstray earyay. Outhernsay Ethodistmay ostlay itsway 15thay aightstray amegay

Officials from the rival school, The University of Oklahoma, "We have considered telling them there is a difference between Latin and Pig Latin, but this is far to much fun. This is almost as good as when they evacuated the school because they found white powder on all the chalk boards.


That's all for this week!

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