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Wednesday, December 10 12:01 AM EST

BBspot Mailbag

Now you too can enjoy my Inbox without the annoying spam. Every week I get some amazing e-mail. Some amazing because of the sheer cluelessness of the sender, some because of the time and energy that went into crafting them and some are just simply amazing.

Believers

I'm not sure if this guy is a Believer or not, in fact I'm not quite sure what he is....

From: xxxxxxxx@yahoo.com.ar]
Sent: Sunday, December 14, 2003 9:39 AM
To: submissions@bbspot.com
Subject:

Dear
I request if your can send me the empty cigarettes packs that their Company takes place to arrive. That which would be a great pleasure to count on them and to annex it to my collection. Very sincerely and from already very grateful.
Best Regards
xxxxxxxx
Republica Argentina

Huh?

Ensenam Ayele keeps bringing in the Believers...

From: xxxxxx
Sent: Saturday, December 13, 2003 11:42 PM
To: briggsb@bbspot.com
Subject: money to give

How would I be able to recieve a gift for this person? I don't need Millions.

Bill

I'm sure any amount of free money would be fine for this guy.

From: xxxxxxxx@hotmail.com]
Sent: Thursday, December 11, 2003 8:24 PM
To: briggsb@bbspot.com
Subject: PLEASE HELP ME!

I read the article about the billionaire giving away money, He gave $12 million to one guy and changed his life. Well I am trying to start my own business so I can better care for my five children. I only need $25,000. So if he would like to help my family We would all greatly appreciate this. I am trying to start a small vending machine business and eventually grow to a large one. The amount of money i need covers the machines,products,and advertising. If there would be anyway you could get me in contact with this gentleman I would greatly appreciate it. I would even be able to pay the money back to a charity or what ever he would like. Thank you for your time.

I wonder how many of these people are trying to scam the fake non-scammer?

This next guy isn't a Believer, but he enjoys the Nigerian scammers as much as I do...

From: David
Sent: Monday, December 15, 2003 6:42 AM
To: briggsb@bbspot.com
Subject: FW: MARIAM ABACHA (WIDOW).

Thought some of your readers might be interested seeing as how your previous article elicited such a big response. I am sure the offer is valid, despite warnings to the contrary listed at the bottom of the BBC News site link. I would take advantage of the offer, but I have already been given enough money by your previous Nigerian philanthropist, and do not need any more.

Regards
David

(sent from David's desk on a fucking big yacht somewhere in the
Mediterranean)

<nigerian spam e-mail snipped>

I wonder how many people will respond about this e-mail?

Educational Material

I sure hope this isn't a Believer...

From: xxxxxxx@xxxxxx.edu]
Sent: Tuesday, December 16, 2003 1:58 PM
To: 'briggsb@bbspot.com'
Subject: Request permission to use

Mr. Briggs,

I coordinate and teach in the xxxxxxxxx program, an online program. The LTN 101 class, Intro to Library Services has an introductory unit on copyright. I would like permission to provide to the students, an attachment of the article from Monday, December 15 12:01 AM EST, "God Considers Smiting Bible Pirates" by Kristian Werner. This is a humorous way to reinforce book copyright with the students.

Thank you for considering this request.

This isn't the first time I've had a request from a professor to use BBspot material for a class. I wonder when some college will offer an entire course based on BBspot material?

BBjedi

The BBjedi picture maker did e-mail me a version with my face lit up more to satisfy the other geeks, but it reminded George of another gaffe...

From: George
Sent: Tuesday, December 09, 2003 11:07 PM
To: Brian Briggs
Subject: BBJedi - not the worst error of the type

The letter regarding your not-so-lightsaber photograph reminded me of another such mistake, one that goes to show that such things happen even when people are supposedly paying close attention to detail.

Shortly after the movie "Apollo 13" was released, Popular Mechanics magazine published a nit-picking article about it. (They were quick to point out that they loved the movie, and were nit-picking in a good-humored way.) One of the errors they noticed was a sequence in which a shot of one character, with the full Earth visible in the window behind him, was immediately followed by shot of a character against the opposite wall of the spacecraft, with the full moon visible in the window behind him. To paraphrase Popular Mech's comment: "Either they were WAY off course, or the spacecraft was as bright as the sun!"

They also noticed that the sailor who helped them to board the ship at the end of the movie was way too old for his rank--and that he bore some resemblance to the real Jim Lovell.

Reindeer Games

I guess I can't be surprised at how many people wrote in to tell me everything I wanted to know about the reindeer names. Here's one of the more humorous observations...

From: Eric
Sent: Wednesday, December 10, 2003 2:14 PM
To: 'briggsb@bbspot.com'
Subject: Re: Pedantic, Me?

Hello Brian!

I am a "Long Time Reader, First Time Responder"

At the risk of ending up ridiculed on your Mailbag page, I would like to point something else in "Rudolph the red nosed reindeer." If you believed that Donder was actually Donner (german for Thunder) and Blitzen (german for Lightning), then you probably believed that Vixen was "Vicksen", the german word for masturbation. It all makes sense to me...

I don't want to know what Prancer means.

That's all for this week!

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