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Wednesday, June 8 12:00 AM ET

BBspot Mailbag

Now you too can enjoy my Inbox without the annoying spam. Every week I get some amazing e-mail. Some amazing because of the sheer cluelessness of the sender, some because of the time and energy that went into crafting them and some are just simply amazing.


Believers

One man is really anxious to meet the Nigerian billionaire...

From: Roger
Sent: Sunday, May 29, 2005 6:30 PM
To: briggsb@bbspot.com
Subject:
Importance: High

Yes,,,, would it be possible if I could get The Nigerian Philanthropist Mr .Esenam Ayele the Nigerian Billionaires e-mail since you did the story on him am looking for his help badly please reply ASAP Roger

And 20 minutes later in case I missed the first e-mail...

From: Roger
Sent: Sunday, May 29, 2005 6:50 PM
To: briggsb@bbspot.com
Subject:

looking for Mr Esenam Alele home page or e-mail addres hope you can help me replay ASAP please Roger

It has been a long time since we've had a Believer for Metallica's "Download This" album, which is still one of my favorite BBspot stories ...

From: Marc
Sent: Friday, June 03, 2005 7:55 AM
To: briggsb@bbspot.com
Subject: Metallica Download This

Hey Man,
I have searched high and low looking for the Metallica "Download This" album could you give me a link as to where I can buy the CD or download it?

I told him the album didn't exist and he replied...

From: Marc
Sent: Sunday, June 05, 2005 6:39 AM
To: Brian Briggs
Subject: RE: Metallica Download This

why put a fucking thing up on ya site then?

My reply to this included the word "moron", hopefully we'll have more from this genius next week.

Not necessarily a Believer, but somebody that takes Yu-Gi-Oh a bit too seriously. At first I had doubts if this was a true Believer, but it was from the Netherlands, so...

From: xxxxxxzonnet.nl
Sent: Monday, May 30, 2005 4:42 PM
To: briggsb@bbspot.com
Subject:

How dare you!!!!!!! FUCKING NOOB! You have no idea what Yu-Gi-Oh is do you? it is NO fuckign pokemon ripoff!!!! it has even nothing to do with it!!!!!!!!!! How can you write a review like that!!!!! DIE YOU!

DIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I don't even know where to begin with this one, so I'll let you make your own jokes.


Alternate Top 11s

A BBspotter wrote in with an idea for an alternate top 11 list...

From: Nicolas Björklund
Sent: Monday, May 30, 2005 4:59 AM
To: briggsb@bbspot.com
Subject: Hot Sauce Top 11

Hi Brian,

I was reading the Hot Sauce Top 11 and started thinking that some of the sauces you have on the list come rather close to real sauces. I therefore felt it might be fun to put together a top 11 of actual sauces.

1. Anal Annihilation
2. Ass in Hell
3. Bad Day in Baghdad
4. Butt Twister
5. Capital Punishment
6. DOA - Cyanide Hot Sauce
7. Psycho Bitch
8. Religious Experience Apocalypse Habanero Hot
9. Satan's Slow Burn
10. Screaming Rasta Lost in Boiling Lake
11. Spontaneous Combustion

Of course, if you want to scare a real hot sauce freak you need a bottle of Blair's 16 Million Reserve. The strength of a hot sauce is measured in "scoville units". Tabasco for instance is rated at about 1200 scoville. Blair's 16 Million Reserve is rated at 16 million scoville. Now that's anal annihilation for ya.


That's all for this week!

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