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Wednesday, June 13 12:00 AM ET

BBspot Mailbag

Now you too can enjoy my Inbox without the annoying spam. Every week I get some amazing e-mail. Some amazing because of the sheer cluelessness of the sender, some because of the time and energy that went into crafting them and some are just simply amazing.


BBelievers

I believe this guy is referencing this old story about how researchers have discovered that plants feel pain, so now they are eyeing rocks. Some people write their email as if I'm watching them browse, or that I've only published on story on BBspot so I know exactly what they are talking about. I only have two eyes, so I can't keep one on everyone...

From: Lawrence
Date: May 26, 2007 5:04 PM
Subject: How about .
To: briggsb@bbspot.com

I watch a lot of Glen Beck, it is a news show that talks about things happening around the world. He had this Vegetarian on there one time and others before and claims it not right to eat any animal meat. But I get tired of these people about talking of killing poor animals. They do not care about killing poor helpless plants. These Vegetarian people think they are so smug and throw their noses up in the air. Get in touch with Glen Beck. I believe you can get him at glenbeck.com. I would enjoy seeing him get that Vegetarian back on and put him to the test of killing poor helpess plants.

It's not surprising to me that a fan of Glen Beck would be a BBeliever.

I am getting a lot of requests for help on Esenam Ayele's MySpace profile. This woman sent a couple of pleas for help, but I told her the profile wasn't real. She was a bit upset she wasn't getting her free money...

You should be ashamed of yourself, you have hurt how many countless people that are like me. You have given them a slight ray of HOPE only to be beat down again. I pray God's mercy on your souls.

I'm not an expert on "souls," but I thought I was only allowed one according to the rules. Could be that because I have such a big, caring soul that I need another for the splash over.

This next person looking for money is lucky I have such honest souls since she is ready to hand over her account number to me...

hi this is Tara from calgary alberta canada. i heard that u r giving away 12 to 15 milion i like to put my daughter through school and through college and i would like to own a house for me and my daughter. so if u can e-mail me back and tell me what i have to do i will give u my account number.oh here is my e-mail if u don't have it xxxxxxx@hotmail.com.

The past couple of weeks the Sony Music Exec has received a lot of request from bands on MySpace. Most must think they've struck the motherlode when I agree to add them...

Dear Andrew,

I'm HOTT and GREAT at what i do!!

I've just turned 20years old, from London/ England, living in LA.

CHECK ME OUT!!

Represented by <snipped agent's names>

Andrew, I think your amazing and have had an awesome career, I'm only looking to be represented by the BEST.

Much love and i look forward to meeting you!!

My kindest Regards

Unfortunately for her, she's a girl.


Scary Lamb

This will have to be the last word on the origins of 28 Years Later...

From: Marcus
Date: May 24, 2007 1:51 PM
Subject: Scary Lamb... for Kids!
To: briggsb@bbspot.com

Check out this (flash), which after seeing your Scary Bunny pic link, I realized I needed to send along. This is an Israeli kids show with a lamb named Shoshanna. This particular show has an entire zoo filled with rather frightening animals interacting with children... "get them away from me!" :)

Otherwise, I absolutely love your website, and have checked it every day for the past four to five years. Thank you for bringing joy to my life.

Your children will need counseling for years after seeing it


Weekly Limerick

The winner of the 2003 and 2006 Geek Limerick contest has volunteered to write a weekly limerick for BBspot...

From: Seth

Keep your tender meat "safe", we are told.
Use a fridge to make sure it stays cold.
Then the microwave heat
Makes it ready to eat.
Oh, and don't cook your own two-month old.

 

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