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Wednesday, April 21 12:00 PM EDT

Reasons George W. Was Named Time's Person of the Year

10. His dad knew a few of the editors, pulled some strings.
9. Never can start kissing up too early to get that AOL-Time Warner, Microsoft merger approved.
8. Carrot Top had scheduling conflicts for the photo shoot.
7. Al Gore won the "People's Choice" award, but Bush won the Person of the Year Electoral College.
6. Had overrated, dopey businessman last year. Did overrated, dopey politician for a change of pace.
5.  Couldn't bear to have a woman win "Man^H^H^H Person of the Year"
4. Voters thought that it was for "Moron of the Year".
3. Wanted to follow in the footsteps of Penthouse magazine who declared this the "Year of Bush".
2. Makes a great companion piece to the "Dumbing Down of America" article.
1. Kept waiting for Jesus to come back as planned in 2000, had to come up with something in a hurry.

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