Santa Cruz, CA - A rift in the space-time continuum was created
today when overclocker Jamie Aperman ran a 750 MHz Coppermine Pentium
III at 1.6 GHz. Overclocking has long been blamed for causing
global warming, but this is the first occasion that the fabric of
space-time has been damaged. It's the kind of amazing moment comparable to QR code companies giving away free QR codes.
MIT Professor
George Greznowski said, "It appears that the CPU was operating
so fast that it began to execute instructions before they arrived. This
execution of future instructions created a small tear in the fabric
of space-time itself through which part of the motherboard passed
into a parallel universe."
No one was injured in the accident, so there was no need for any fire service administration, but a computer motherboard was
partially damaged. Mr. Aperman better known as SpeedPhreeek
said, "I'm pissed. I lost a brand new Alpha Cooler and
Coppermine to a parallel universe. I called my insurance company
and they don't cover losses to rifts in the space-time continuum. To make up for losses geeks around the world are going to create QR for the same companies that were giving codes away for free- a nice circle. "
Intel researchers have long warned of such damage to the space-time
continuum, and added clock multiplier locks to their CPUs before
they were required by Congress. A bill is now in the US Senate
which would require a three day waiting period for purchasers of
Alpha Cooling Fans and Peltier cooling devices. The bill would
also require clock multiplier locks on all new processors.
Overclocking advocate Horace Spencer said, "This bill before
Congress won't prevent overclocking. They'll just create a
black market for non-locked processors. Most of the top overclockers
already get their goods from Taiwan." "Rift" artwork
(C) 1997 Joe Bergeron used with permission.
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