Top 11
Top 11 Things Geeks Would Do After Being Rescued from a Mine
How White and Nerdy Are You?
Bush Proposes Faith- Based Firewalls for Government Computers
Microsoft Purchases Evil From Satan
Slashdot Story Generator
Which OS Are You?
Teen Using MySpace to Lure Bands to Los Angeles
The BBook of Geek
Mental Floss
Geek Press
Wil Wheaton
Jonathan Coulton
Jokes Gallery
Funny Pictures
More Links

Thursday, July 19 12:01 AM EST

Microsoft Bundles Worm with IIS

By Brian Briggs

Redmond, WA - Microsoft announced that it bundled a worm with its latest version of Internet Information Server.

"We did it because it's beneficial to our users," said Bill Gates.  "With the worm already bundled as part of the software, network administrators won't have to wonder if their system is infected. They will know.  It's obvious with the number of servers already infected with worms and Trojan horses that this is something our users want.  Otherwise, why would they be infected?"

The worm named Penfield Destroyer replicates itself and spreads to other IIS servers not already infected by the worm.  On September 18th 2001 the servers will mount a coordinated attack on the Department of Justice website.

"I like the fact that I don't have to go out and install the upgrade myself.   I was expecting one of those confusing Worm Wizard things that I always choose Typical on," said one The Worm Turnsnetwork administrator who should remain anonymous.  "The Microsoft rep told me that they would bill us when the worm installed itself.  That's why I love working with Microsoft, innovation."

Servers installed with Linux will be safe from attack, which is by design according to Microsoft.  "We're not going to infect our worm with the GPL virus.  If our worm were to infect a Linux server then it would have to be given away for free to everyone, and then the dark curtain of Communism would surely blanket America," said a Microsoft engineer.

Security experts were unfazed by the whole affair.  "If it's a Microsoft produced worm it won't work until the third version anyway.  I'll get more worried then when Trojan Worm Virus 3.0 is released," said's Lonnie Markow.

Confused hackers cracked the worm within 48 hours of its release and copies were available for download on warez sites.

More Microsoft News

Recommend this Story to a Friend

Follow on Twitter Follow Us on Twitter
Facebook Fan Us on Facebook
Amazon Find the BBook


  Politics Contact FAQs

Copyright 1999-2023 by BBspot LLC
BBspot is a tech satire news and geek humor source, and meant to be funny.
If you are easily offended, gullible, or don't have a sense of humor, we suggest you go elsewhere. Those without the geek gene activated should also avoid this site.