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Wednesday, January 10 12:00 AM ET

BBspot Mailbag

Now you too can enjoy my Inbox without the annoying spam. Every week I get some amazing e-mail. Some amazing because of the sheer cluelessness of the sender, some because of the time and energy that went into crafting them and some are just simply amazing.


Please tell me this guy doesn't BBelieve that Microsoft purchased evil from Satan..

From: john R
Sent: Friday, January 05, 2007 6:04 PM
Subject: RE:Microsot Purchases Evil From Satan

guess that is gonna be messed up.
Soon people will be looking for opensource.

That is definitely "messed up."

This must be the week for BBelievers of ancient BBspot stories. How about one for the Metallica's new Napster-proof album?

Sent: Sunday, January 07, 2007 5:59 PM
Subject: Metallica Rant

Lars and the rest of his Metallica losers need to focus on other things, besides Napster. That idiot just threw down the gauntlet to a myriad of computer geeks that will do whatever they can to download this for free. I personally feel like buying their shitty CD and duping it and giving copies of it for free, just to shut Mr. Ulrich up. Why don’t these rich metal assholes do something else with their fame, such as being advocates for peace in the world, famine, cures for sickness etc, rather than crying about someone ripping them off.

Lars you are truly the poster boy for assholes of the world.

Thanks for letting me rant

Now we just need an Office Jesus BBeliever and the week will be complete.

The Nigerian Billionaire is running out of money from all the people eager to accept his philanthropy...

From: Diane
Sent: Monday, January 08, 2007 4:09 PM
Subject: grants

Brian hi can you please tell me how to get in touch with this Esenam Ayele in Lagos Nigeria & any other Philanthropist you come across thanks have a super day your friend Don Please send inquires to: [address snipped]

I decided to set up a MySpace profile for Esenam. Yes I know, it's only encouraging them, but that's the whole point right?

This guy needs a record contract from our teen posing as a record executive over at MySpace. Maybe she can get him down into her basement. From the inbox over at the MySpace profile...

Mr. Lack,
I would like to introduce myself to you. My name is xxxxxx Smith and I am a recent graduate of Texas Tech University. While pursuing my degree I have also been pursuing a career in music. Given your vast knowledge and experience in Music as well as television, I would like to ask you for advice as to go about my attempt for a career in music. I know you're an extremely busy man so I appreciate you even reading this. I have songs and pictures on my page so please feel free to give them a look and listen. Thank you so much for your time and I hope to hear from you.

The best way is to come over to my house! My mom is going to be gone shopping at the outlet mall for a few hours tomorrow!

Weekly Limerick

The winner of this year's Geek Limerick contest has volunteered to write a weekly limerick for BBspot. I haven't decided where to put it yet, so this week's I'll put in the Mailbag...

From: Seth

Slamdance, made to promote innovation,
Gave the Columbine game termination.

As a movie, or book,
They'd have taken a look,
But games still have no shot in our nation.

That's all for this week!

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