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Tuesday, May 8 12:01 AM EST

Revolutionary Changes Channel

By Brian Briggs

Fredonia, KS - Gregory Samson awoke one morning and found himself transformed into a revolutionary.  He's not sure what initiated the change but every facet of his life has been affected by his transformation, even his TV viewing habits.

"I walked into the living room and saw my roommate, Frank watching MSNBC. I told him to change the channel.  He refused. I walked up to the TV and changed the channel myself. He changed it back with the remote.  I turned the TV off and blocked the remote control sensor on the TV.  I know it was putting myself in the line of fire, but I didn't want another penny of my money going to the evil that is Microsoft."

An irate Frank called him a "giant pest" and stormed out of the room. "He thinks he's this big shot subversive that's changing the world.  I don't think downloading MP3s from Napster makes him a revolutionary, and the beret certainly doesn't give me that impression either.  I told him if he was really about changing things he would make sacrifices for his cause.  He told me I was thinking old school.   He was a 'new revolutionary' and the old rules didn't apply."

The way Gregory listens to music has also undergone a metamorphosis. With the release of Napster, Gregory could stick it to the man even more, but that has recently hit a snag, "It's a little harder to fight the power now that Napster has put the lame-o filters on, but I'm working on alternatives. The man won't keep us down for long."

Gregory continued, "I couldn't decide what was more revolutionary.   Installing Linux or running a pirated copy of Windows 98.  It was a real tough decision since neither of them will work on my iMac. An Apple, that will be my downfall.   I just know it."

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