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Wednesday, May 14 12:01 AM EST

BBspot Mailbag

Now you too can enjoy my Inbox without the annoying spam. Every week I get some amazing e-mail. Some amazing because of the sheer cluelessness of the sender, some because of the time and energy that went into crafting them and some are just simply amazing.


Jar-Jaromir is still fooling them ...

From: Dawn []
Sent: Saturday, May 10, 2003 5:21 AM
Subject: Jar-Jaromir

You gotta be kinding me, tell me it's not true "There's this funny scene where Jar-Jaromir decides it's best to hand the ring over to Sauron, but then he drops it and kicks it into Mount Doom. Hi-larious." ahh so Jar-Jaromir destroyes the ring, sorry but i can't believe that cause then they would be telling the end, and producers never tell the end of film.

Yeah, producers never spoil anything like revealing that Gandalf is still alive. <shakes head>

Apple Fanatics

Write a story criticizing Apple users and you're bound to get some e-mail. Many people misunderstood the point of the article, which wasn't to encourage piracy, but to make fun of Mac fanatics that drool every time Steve Jobs opens his mouth. Some of the e-mail was nice, some not so nice...

From: Timothy []
Sent: Tuesday, May 06, 2003 10:28 PM
Subject: Stealing Music

Yes, you could go to Kazaa, as I have in the past, and steal a track of music instead of paying a whole dollar for a song that someone spent time, sweat, and money on to make it sound the best that it could for their loyal fans. I know that the music conglomerations are their own worst enemy, but if we the consumer doesn't at least try to help our favorite band that band might not be able to make the industry understand that there is a large fan base, but they only steal the music they listen to so no one knows. If you are so hard up that you cannot afford $.99 a song maybe you need to get off your ass and get a real job.

I'm a compassionate person. If I had ninety-nine cents I wouldn't waste it on a song. I'd send it over to you so you could buy a clue.

At the end of that Apple article I asked the Mac fans, in jest, to send me over a dollar for reading the article. What do you know...

Sent: Friday, May 09, 2003 9:35 AM
Subject: Here is my dollar.

Dear BBspot,

You've got cash!

John xxxxxx just sent you money with PayPal.

John xxxxxx is a Verified buyer.

Payment Details

Amount: $1.00
Transaction ID: 4MS2896XXXXXXXX
Subject: Here is my dollar.
Note:(Eds. Note: Apple users, the cost of reading this article is $1. Please send your payment to

Thanks for the great article. Here is my dollar.


The rest of you probably just downloaded the article off Kazaa! Thieves!

Not everybody could find my PayPal address...

From: Paul []
Sent: Thursday, May 08, 2003 9:30 AM
Subject: 'cooler' poll

If I sell my soul, maybe you'll stop using the words 'Neo' and 'cool' in
the same county, much less the same poll. Hmm...

Nice Apple article - can you take a check?


From: Gary []
Sent: Saturday, May 10, 2003 3:59 AM
Subject: one dollar

I use mac OS. Should I use paypal? I really enjoyed the article.

I'm Rubber, You're Glue

I guess not everybody appreciates the traffic that BBspot sends their way. Long time reader and typo-catcher Richie noticed...

From: Richie []
Sent: Thursday, May 08, 2003 1:34 AM
To: 'Brian Briggs'
Subject: State-Ends


Did you see this in

<script type="text/javascript">
if (document.referrer.indexOf("ampland") != -1 ||
document.referrer.indexOf("bbspot") != -1 ||
document.referrer.indexOf("blinkerfluid") != -1)
document.location = document.referrer;

So when we click on your link it throws us back to, that is hilarious !!!

Why put a site on the Internet if you don't want people to see it?

Mad Max: Beyond Golden Acres

Isn't Mel Gibson getting a little old for this?

From: []
Sent: Wednesday, May 07, 2003 4:06 PM
Subject: Unsolicited (hopefully) Humorous Material

Maybe some of these might find their way to a top 11 or poll. I did a few for Die Hard (not included), if u r interested I will send them.

Mad Max: Fury Road is the working title of the fourth in the series. Here are some other possible titles:


Mad Max: Beyond Reasonable / Beyond Tolerance / Beyond Understanding (obvious) / Beyonce Knowles
Mad Max: Mad-Lethal-Patriot-Heart (Directed/Produced/Written By Mel Gibson)
Mad Max vs. Alien / Mad Max vs. Predator / Mad Max vs. Godzilla / Mad Max vs. King Kong / Mad Max vs. The Daleks (<--- The T.A.R.D.I.S. takes the form of a supercharged mercury capri and K9 sits in the passenger seat)
Lord Of The Piston Rings: The Dealership Of The Ring
Mad Max: The Phantom Noise Coming From Somewhere Under The Hood
When Mad Max Met Sally
M. Night Shyamalan's: Road Signs
My Big, Mad Max Wedding
Mad Max, Where's My Car?
maX4: Madmen United
Mad Max: Humongous' Day Out (Baby's Day Out)
Mad Max's Next Movie (obscure Cheech & Chong Reference)
Mad Max 4: Max Madder (Die Hard 2: Die Harder)
The Max And The Madest (The Fast And The Furious)
Mad Max 4: Mad Maxine (ewww!)
Kung Pow Max: Enter The Car (wee-oo, wee-oo, chosen one!)
Mad Max And The Tempo Of Doom


maXena: Road Warrior Princess (again ewww!)
Hugga-Mugga-Mad-Max (obscure Maxwell house TV commercial reference)
Me And Max (Extremely Obscure Canadian TV Reference. Steve, Morag, Dave and Max Smith starring)(BTW Steve Smith=Red Green)
Mad About Max (starring Paul Reiser and Helen Hunt as "The Gyro Captain")
Mad Max & Grace
Mad Max And The Bear
Mad Max Headroom: 20 Minutes Into The Movie


Mad Max: Bears On Wheels (obscure Dr. Seuss reference)
Slightly More Tolerant Max
Mild Max
Mad Max In L.A. / Mad Max In Boston / Mad Max In (place name of large gridlocked city here)
Mad Max: Golden Max (Golden Axe: obscure C64 computer game reference circa '87) (could also be Goldmember or
Goldeneye reference)
Sam And Mad Max Hit The Road (obscure PC game circa '93)

Love is a snowmobile racing across the tundra and then suddenly it flips over, pinning you underneath. At night, the ice weasels come.

That's all for this week. Thanks.

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