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Wednesday, October 19 12:00 AM ET

BBspot Mailbag

Now you too can enjoy my Inbox without the annoying spam. Every week I get some amazing e-mail. Some amazing because of the sheer cluelessness of the sender, some because of the time and energy that went into crafting them and some are just simply amazing.


One reader goes nuts over an old Harry Potter story...

Sent: Wednesday, October 12, 2005 8:13 PM
Subject: Can't believe...

I would just like to send this letter to inform you that rumors like Emma Watson is being replaced by Britney Spears in HP films is a.) RUBBISH! We're on number 4 already people. b.) Hurtful. How would you all like it if you were on your way to becoming a popular actress when some crackpot news service says you're being replaced by Britney Spears? c.) Her fans, were very shocked and scared when we found this out. I of course didn't believe that rumor for one second, you see, I don't listen to things put out by new services no one has ever heard of. And one more thing, George W. Bush is an excellent president, I don't see him burning down Vietnamese homes for FUN! Darn you people who ruin the name of honest hard working folk.

With people like this you should fear for the future of our world.

The Nigerian billionaire gets more BBelievers this week ...

Sent: Thursday, October 06, 2005 7:10 AM
Subject: Contact

Hello, my name is Laura Hodge-Scott and I am the president of the xxxxxxx Club here in Xxxxxx Alabama ("proud to be a scammer"). We are the oldest female social club here in Xxxxxx, Alabama. We have been in business since 1948, and a member of the Xxxxxx Chamber of Commerence. To make a long story short we have different kinds of activities during the year, cottillions, money raisers and we give the money away to miniority females to help them through college. We have finally purchased a building here in Xxxxxx to hold are meeting in, and we are in dire need to pay off the mortage and buy computer equipment and to get our parking lot paved. We are currently working on a grant from the National Grant Conference that just went through our cithy. We are working on a 501(k) right now. I hope Lagos Nigeria Billionaire ESENAM AYELE receives this message. We need help from above if you know what I mean. Him being a miniority should understand the plight of black young females in America, they really need help in various ways. Please see this gets to Mr. AYELE, may god be with you. xxx-xxx-xxxx (home)
xxx-xxx-xxxx(cell). Also my husband xxxxxx is Disabled from the U.S. Army and is trying to purchase a older (1995 Corvette) he now owes a "95 chevy camero and still owes 4,000.00 on it, if you could email xxxxx@xxxxx.COM and talk to xxxxxxx, he knows what car I am looking for. Bless you forever.

Wow is all I can say to that one.

Sent: Friday, October 07, 2005 6:25 PM
Subject: Referring to article on BBSpot

Is this story really true? I've received emails in the past such as this one and thought it was a hoax. If this man is really looking for people to give money too, the community we work in could surely use it. It is a small and poor community in Mississippi. We are looking for ways to open educational centers, day care centers and other job opportunities for these people. If you know of other philanthropist who are looking for good works to invest in please inform me of them.

No surprise it was from another AOLer. I think this next one sets the standard for length...

Sent: Tuesday, October 18, 2005 3:10 PM
Subject: Nigerian billionaire Esenam Ayele/Article

Please forgive me for contacting you, however, I read your article on the internet.

Before you just ignore yet another email, please take a moment to read my story.

I am a desperate single mother of two young children, and one older, who was financially destroyed when I divorced my sociopathic (documented) husband. I have tried seeking help from several sources (Human Services - a real joke), low income housing (wait-listed and would not allow our pets that are my 2 daughters' closest companions - my older daughter is emotionally fragile at this time, and would truly be harmed to give away our dogs), child care assistance (to be able to work more), and others. I have come to dead ends it seems everywhere I turn. I have no family to stay with in this state, and I'm not allowed to leave without endangering the children (i.e., giving him the children). I don't know if you are aware of the family court tragedy in our country, but we are one of it's more unfortunate victims.

My ex is a documented former child abuser, alcoholic, drug user, and more. My children have not only witnessed abuse to their siblings and myself, but were also the recipients - unfortunately, too much of the younger childrens' abuse was difficult to document (behind closed doors if you will). Our animals (dogs) were also abused, but unfortunately also cannot speak for themselves. One developed Addisons disease as a result of the continual stress. The children have told authorities about these things, however, the ex says that they lied, and he could afford a good attorney - I could not. I have an incredible amount of documentation regarding my story and also witnesses (letters) of what my children have gone through or are going through at present. The court (or should I say his lawyer) deems everything as hearsay, and as I said before Human Services is a serious joke - even when the oldest child was assaulted and the ex pled guilty, they became only minimally involved. All the children have reported things to them also, but all have been ignored (again, the ex is a superb con-artist type, and insists they are lying). He was a boy scout leader when I met him - I'm sure you can imagine the type (goes to church on Sunday, and parties on Saturday). Most people have never seen the "dark" side of him.

In any case, I am trying to only afford a home (which I cannot), and we will soon be living in a travel trailer without help. I pay the health insurance for the children ($300), most of their medical (my daughter's counseling bill - a court ordered therapist, was running over $500/monthly - mostly not covered by insurance, yet my ex who works under the table in construction pays only $480 for 2 children (both requiring child care for me to work). In the past 4 years, he has received over $160,000 from his family, my family was not very wealthy and both of my parents are deceased. Child care for the summer runs over $1,600 monthly. We probably don't need to mention ongoing legal fees (my ex has me frequently in court with motions, etc., every time he gets a whim). My income (I have a disability that I'm trying very hard to overcome) is only $2,450 from all sources. All of our belongings are in storage (another bill), and of course my credit was destroyed and I have recently filed bancruptcy after being left with over $50,000 marital debt. I lost my home of almost 30 years, due to an 8 year marriage. Litigation went over 2 years, my career has been jeapardized (I'm trying to at least maintain that without child care), and we are destitute. For myself, I would never ask for help, but my children mean everything to me. They need at least a home!

I would like to ask only for a down payment on a home and a little extra to replace my vehicle. We have been searching outside of the Denver (high cost area), and have found some that would be small but OK. All of these are priced at under $200,000, all are fix-up (mostly TLC) which I would be willing to do myself. They are in decent areas with decent schools. If we could just get a good down payment for help, I could manage the rest myself. I would also be willing to pay back the funds in small increments, but I can only afford about $5-600 per month for living expenses at this time. Another possibility would be an owner carry situation, whereby I would make payments directly back to the source - I just can't afford the real estate scams, or high payments. Of course, their name would be on the property as well.

I must maintain a vehicle for work (I am an apprentice appraiser), and driving the children to their supervised visits (Friday drop-off is at one end of the city, and Sunday pick-up is on the other side), which is also starting to go bad. The ex had done a substantial amount of vandalism to my former home, and vehicles. We (the police, insurance investigator, me, the neighbor) all know he did it, but evidence is "circumstantial". Restraining orders are not worth the paper they're written on.

If this person is wanting to help individuals who really need help, perhaps he would be willing to offer us a little help, plus be very likely to get at least part of it back over time. Please forward this email to someone who may be able to help. My sister is willing to co-sign a loan, but no one in my family can help with a down payment, and thereby, it makes the payments more than I can manage.

I thank you for any assistance you can offer,

PS - If you need to view this documentation, I can provide it. Please be aware that even the Justice for Children Organization is appalled at what has happened in my case, and they have been supportive as much as possible.

Even if there were an Esenam Ayele willing to give out money. Why would these people send their sob story to me and not just ask for Esenam's e-mail address?

That's all for this week!

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