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Thursday, July 30 12:00 AM ET

Microsoft and Yahoo Join Forces to Build Giant Robot to Destroy Google

By Brian Briggs follow me on Twitter.


Redmond, WA - In addition to their recent search partnership, Microsoft and Yahoo have agreed to build a giant robot to destroy Google.

"It's really our only chance to catch them," said Microsoft CEO Steve Ballmer. "They have such a big lead in search that a giant robot is the only solution."

Analysts think this is yet another Microsoft move away from their core competencies of software development. "As far as I know Microsoft doesn't have any experience building giant robots," said Lehman Brothers tech analyst Wallace Evans.

Ballmer countered that Microsoft's experience with creating AI for its series of MechWarrior games gave it "all the experience needed. I think Mr. Evans forgot about the Xbox and the animatronic Barney doll we made too."

It's widely known that Google can be controlled with a robots.txt file, and that's what Ballmer is counting on. "If a simple text file can control the company, just think what a real Live robot can do," he said.

According to the terms of the deal, Microsoft will build the internal software for the robot (codenamed Bob), while Yahoo will create the outer shell. Three other yet to be named search companies will join together to help create a robot the likes of which the world has never seen.

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Yahoo CEO Carol Bartz said, "The work of five companies becomes one powerful fighting unit. All I can say is megathrusters are go!"

Many suspect that with Yahoo designing the outer shell of the robot, it will use an abundance of ads as a kind of a "billboard camouflage" for urban environment.

Google is expected to beef up their android in response.

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