Atlanta, Georgia – Reporters at CNN have confirmed that Scott Frozzik's claim of being from the future are true.
Frozzik was found naked in an alley in Atlanta by police on October 23, and claimed he had a message from the future that needed to be heard by all. Police, thinking that Frozzik was just another crackpot, arrested him on indecent exposure. Frozzik was released a few hours later.
That would've been the end of the story, but a CNN intern at the police station caught word of Frozzik's claim and investigated further. Later, CNN reporter Buzz Thomas was brought in, and was astounded by what he heard.
"At first I was skeptical, but Frozzik convinced me," said Thomas. "Like he knew that the Yankees won the World Series in 2025, and that the flying car would finally be common in 2175. How else could he know these things?"
CNN experts agreed with Thomas' assessment of the situation. "There's no doubt in our mind that Frozzik is from the future," said time travel expert Martin Dent. "He fits all the profiles of a time traveler. From the warnings about technology nearly destroying humanity and his knowledge of the alien invasion of 2012, it checks out."
Frozzik's only request is to address the nation. CNN has agreed to offer their feed, to other news networks, and all will be carrying the speech live at 9:00 PM Eastern time tonight.
Update 9:05 PM: As a rapt audience of millions watched, Frozzik delivered his succinct message from the future. "Be sure to drink your Ovaltine." Frozzik then tapped his wrist and in a burst of light disappeared from view.
|
