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Thursday, January 10 12:00 AM ET

New Upgrades Will Bring Web 2.0 Functionality to "Hubbl" Space Telescope

By Brian Briggs

Houston, TX – New upgrades to the Hubble Space Telescope will make the telescope 90 times more powerful and also add Web 2.0 functionality on the companion Web site "hubbl."

“It's time to bring the project into the 21st century,” said NASA project manager Damon Evans. “Sure, top scientists have great ideas, but so do people on the Internet. Why not open it up to them? We're also adding a social networking aspect.  Were there any other buzzwords I left out?”

Evans said that people could submit their own theories about the data that Hubble collects, and the most “hubbled” will “gain wide acceptance by the scientific community. Who knows maybe we'll get a good theory to challenge the Big Bang!”

Even the direction the telescope points will depend on the users of “We'll set the controls to whatever is the most popular coordinates are for that day,” said Evans. “I do want to note that we're not turning the telescope toward Earth, so unfortunately no Jessica Alba beach shots will be available.”

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Many in the science community who rely on the Hubble Telescope for their research were not pleased, including Tom Richmond, an astrophysicist at Stanford, who said, "I don't want my research on the time-distortion properties of tachyon-field emissions to be derailed, because some kid thinks black holes are cool. That's not how science should work."

In addition to the exciting science aspects of the upgrade, people will also be able to “friend” stars and galaxies that they like, and if aliens from those areas ever contact Earth they'll be notified in their “HubbleFeed."

The ambitious plan hopes to bring more participation from young people. Profits from advertising on the site will fund the “Hubble Space Laser Cannon” project which will be used to destroy incoming asteroids and the upcoming invasion from the Andromeda galaxy.

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